Fight for Me!
Just like in telenovelas, Latinas want a man to give it their all when the relationship is skittish. If we express dissatisfaction, we want you to hold us in a deep, passionate embrace, even when we hold our head up high. Peruvian chef Morena Escardó has utilized this tactic. When upset with a man, she is guilty of shouting, “Go if you want!”
But does she really mean it?
“It usually means I’m giving you the opportunity to show how much you love me by deciding to stay,”
“Sometimes though, it simply means you better not go.”
Again, it is all about body language — if she is tearing up and emotional she probably just wants that hug and for you to console her. Now, if she has anger in her eyes, that’s when “go” means “go.”
Other terms or phrases to be aware of are “Nothing” and “I’m okay.” Los Angeles native Stefanie Marie admits to getting into plenty of fights with a now ex-boyfriend when he didn’t realize how she felt. Whether it was about housecleaning or him not calling her back it always ended the same way. “The whole ‘I am sorry’ was always followed with me saying ‘I’m ok’ when I really wasn’t and clearly wasn’t,” Marie said.
“But being a man he’d stop trying to figure it out after a minute and I would sit there like, ‘You really don’t know that my actions are saying no, but I mean yes!’”
“It was confusing to him. I just wanted him to show compassion and think for once.”
So, men, the moral of this miscommunication story is to listen to the women in your life. What she says may not be what she means, which is why you must know your woman — her quirks, her pet peeves, her likes and dislikes — and also stay tuned into her emotions. For those men who are still getting to know the women they are dating, watch her when she communicates. Non-verbal cues are just as telling, if not more, to what she’s really trying to say or doesn’t know how to. It’s either that or perpetuate the example above — that Dominicans and Puerto Ricans just can’t get along.