The dating game should be simple. First, you meet someone, be that through a dating platform, in person, or through a friend. Perhaps you’re lucky enough to meet someone impromptu, which can often lead to the best stories.
You then meet, talk about life, see if you match in perspective or differ in fun and stimulating ways. Then see if you’d like to progress it from there. If you like one another, and treat one another with respect, you move forward. If not, you don’t. There are many more people out there. The idea of “the one” is often flawed, when there are so many wonderful people out there you could happily build a life with.
In reality anyone that has been on the dating scene will tell you it’s not that simple. But really, should it be harder than this? Those who help process a quick divorce will often tell you that relationships end when the basics no longer function.
If you’re coming back to the dating market after a while, or haven’t had success as of late, consider some mindset shifts you can make for much more success in your dating life.
Just Have Fun
It’s very easy to “gamify” dating. You might wonder about the “optimal process” for connecting, for texting back the right amount of time. For picking the best place to impress your partner. But the truth is you’re supposed to have fun. That’s all you need to do. Without that, you’ve made dating into a production line and you forget to see the person in front of you. So, make sure to have fun and enjoy yourself. It will do more than any guide online or dating couch can give you.
Prioritize Genuine Connection Over Impressions
The truth is that when you connect with someone, the little goofy mistakes you make. Like snorting when you laugh a little, accidentally dropping your cutlery, making a joke that doesn’t quite land, or talking too much doesn’t really matter. It’s easy to overthink how you’re acting, and yes, good conduct is important. But don’t be afraid to be yourself. Because if you’re not connecting as yourself, why would you want someone to like you for not being who you are?
Let Go Of Unrealistic Expectations
Just as we’re not perfect, the person you date won’t be perfect either. Understanding that can help you see the difference between a red flag and just a natural quirk of who that person is. For example, it might be that the person has a very intensive interest in birdwatching. Sure, that might not be what you’re into, but does that mean they’re lesser for it?
Of course not, in fact it shows a studios appreciation of nature. Perhaps you can share your hobbies with one another. Part of the value of romance and connection is being enamored with their flaws too. Not necessarily having a trophy of a perfect person to put on your shelf. Because who wants a perfect person in their life, that would be exhausting!
With this advice, you’re sure to have a better, more enjoyable and completely authentic time dating.
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