We all make plans for life, and for all of us there comes a time when those plans are upset by life throwing us a curveball. It can be major or minor, a sudden accident or a communication out of nowhere, but either way these moments leave us feeling stuck, stressed, and unsure of how to move forward with life. In such moments, it is easy to feel like things have come to a standstill. But the truth is that life doesn’t stop, the world keeps turning, and even when it feels like it’s impossible, we have to find ways to keep going. Here’s how we can rediscover our strength, step by step.
Accept That It’s OK to Struggle
Pages and pages of “inspirational” literature talk about the importance of staying strong in adversity, which can make us feel like we need to stow away the pain and keep plugging. The truth is that real strength isn’t about ignoring pain; it’s about acknowledging it and still choosing to move forward. Give yourself a moment.
Whether you’ve been through a breakup, had a health scare, or have been in an accident, it’s important to acknowledge that healing isn’t an overnight process. Seeking help, whether it be through therapy or accident lawyers, is perfectly reasonable. Pressing on regardless isn’t going to help you, or anyone else you think is relying on you to do so.
Find Small Ways to Get Control Back
When everything feels like it is up in the air, it can seem like nothing is going to go your way. Taking back the smallest iota of control at this time is important, to show you that the table isn’t tilted against you. Start with simple, manageable steps – some people call them “easy wins”. If your emotions feel overwhelming, take a moment to ground yourself.
If the space around you feels cramped and cluttered, clean just one corner of it and take a moment to appreciate the difference. If you haven’t slept, take a duvet day and focus on yourself for a moment. It’s about getting yourself back, and the more moments of peace and normality you have, the more you’ll feel like you can cope.
Acknowledge Your Support System
Many of us, when something goes wrong in life, worry about letting down our friends, but here’s a secret: the one thing you can do that will really upset your friends is to not let them be there for you. It’s not heroic to say “I’m fine, don’t worry about me”. People will worry all the more when you say that – they want to be there for you, so let them.
It’s normal to struggle with reaching out, and it’s human nature to put on a brave face, so in many ways, ironically, the courageous thing to do is accept that you need help and that there are people there willing to help you. It starts with a text or an email, just explaining what’s going on with you. Get someone to show up and help you with something, whether it’s a household task or an application for compensation or support. While they’re providing practical help, the conversation will flow naturally, and things will feel better.
We’ve all heard the phrase “It’s OK to not be OK”. It’s true, but if you are prepared to get on with not being OK, you’ll be that much closer to being OK again.
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